S.O. came into town to see me this morning. I dont think I’e ever been so happy to see him.
I told him everything going on in my head — how my brain wouldn’t shut up. We talked in the shower until the water ran cold. We have the best conversations in the shower. I didn’t cry. I just started talking and when I’d get to a difficult part, he’d just kiss me and tell me it would be alright and stroke my sopping wet hair.
We were lazy today. After our shower, we just laid in bed and slept. For three hours. I woke up after having a dream about one of my uncles, spooned between him and Vesper Cat. We snuggled and watched Futurama.
One of my acquaintances is moving away and there’s a shindig for her tonight. I got gussied up — lipstick, eyeliner, the works and went out for an hour. I had one vodka martini. However there were a bunch of hipster smokers there killing my allergies, so we dipped out early.
Now, we’re back home.
Today was a good day.
I look at my breakdown last night and it seems millions of miles away and so far removed from who I am and my goals.
But I have to remember I had a breakdown and that it was horrible. I mentioned I was going through an existential depression on FB and some old friends came out of the woodwork, concerned for my wellbeing.
It reminds me there are good things and good people out there.