The Keto Diaries — I Promise I’m Not Pregnant


Well, keto is causing some lady issues of the not having a period variety. And I’m 99% sure I’m not pregnant — the other .1% accounts for a defective pee test and the other .9% accounts for potential immaculate conception.

It happened to Mary!

So, I’m at 12 days… with no visit from the sharks or Aunt Flo or the crimson tide… Spanish Inquisition?

I promise I’m not panicking.

I pretty much spent the weekend indoors because I was being nose-raped by pollen in a bad way. I was getting awful sinus headaches and migraines.

I did make something completely amazing this weekend. I’d originally seen it on Tasty Japan (I’ve sifted through all their videos and I can’t find it on youtube; it looks like the picture above) — it was meatloaf roll up with veggies and cheese, and then wrapped in bacon. The recipe originally used ham, a ubiquitous cheese, and spinach. I did a typical meatloaf recipe, subbing bread crumbs for pork rinds as a binder. Then I spread it out in my pan, laid out some muenster, spinach, mushrooms, and half of a decent sized diced jalapeno.

Wrap in bacon.

Bake at 400 for an hour.

Then I made my first ever Hollandaise to go over it using the recipe below:

And it was the bomb. We ate it over the meat loaf roll up and some sliced roma tomatoes.

I would have taken a bunch of pictures, but we ate it.

And it was good.




10 thoughts on “The Keto Diaries — I Promise I’m Not Pregnant

        • I guess it’s just the way my weird brain works.

          I’ve been told my writing is way too literal. Like, if I’m trying to write something, for instance a fiction piece, I guess I focus too much on it and try too hard, and it ends up reading like a research paper — just very cut and dry, Hemmingwayesque. But with blogging, I just kind of let ideas flow and this is what I did. Maybe I should stop trying so hard. But I feel my blog writing isn’t “suitable” for fiction writing. I guess it was ingrained in me that it’s not particularly “professional.”

          It kind of makes me envious of other authors who are literal wordsmiths. I’m reading Barbara Kingsolver’s “Prodigal Summer” right now, and her prose and dialogue is so beautiful and natural. Doesn’t feel forced. I’m jealous.

          Sorry, kind of pre-coffee rambly reply.


          • When I first started writing I got told my sentences were too wordy and descriptive, then with the same book I got told I needed more descriptions and longer sentences.It’s all a preference thing.

            I think your writing is wonderful the way it expresses a point and the way you tell the entire story. Blogging and fiction are two different things but they do share very common traits. To me it doesn’t matter whether it’s a blog or a novel I would read what you wrote because of the way it’s written and the picture it creates.

            The words above about periods and noses are wonderfully descriptive and the picture created is brilliant, if you write a fiction with those same sort of descriptions it wont ever read like a research paper.

            I look forward to your posts every day, and your ramblings be the pre or post coffee. I could go a coffee right now but it’s 10:30 and I can’t be bothered getting out of the chair.

            Liked by 1 person

          • Aww. Thanks! That means a lot, truly.

            And 10:30 is definitely late for coffee. I’d be up all night and miserable in the morning.

            I’m going to have to dig through my hard drive and find some fiction to post. Unfortunately I think my laptop took a nose dive (probably a power supply issue I haven’t had the time/energy/money to fix). Software problems are easy for me to fix, hardware problems… not so much.

            Liked by 1 person

          • You’re welcome πŸ™‚

            I’m up half the night anyway, never really got over working night shift and it’s been 11 years since I quit. As for being miserable sleep doesn’t change that for me πŸ™‚

            If you find anything I’d love to read it. πŸ™‚

            If you lived around the corner I’d fix your computer so you could post more writings πŸ™‚

            Liked by 1 person

    • LOL. Well, that’s what it feels like. I feel like pollen is violating me.

      I had a hard time typing that without busting out laughing.

      I’ve been in this town for three years, and every year, spring hits me so hard. Luckily, it’s not as bad as the first year — I got hives. But, spring just kills me.

      Liked by 1 person

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