The God Who Loves Me


Good morning, fine folks!

Story time!

So about two years ago, I took some really, really bad advice, that turned out to be illegal, from a friend, who incidentally isn’t a friend anymore…

So, I was making my move from Georgia to Florida official. I got my licence changed over ($56 ouch). Part of that was the Florida DMV cut the corner off of my Georgia drivers license to invalidate it.

Next, to get my car insurance changed over to Florida insurance — My premiums went up a total of $60, because people in Florida can’t drive and I have to pay for it.

Then, was to get my registration changed over.

I had my shiny new car title from where I just paid off my car (very proud). Now, in Georgia to transfer ownership, one just needs to sign off on the title. And bam! Go to the DMV and make it official.

Not in Florida.

Nothing is simple in Florida.

My Nana cosigned my car, so her name was on the title too. Either she had to be there in person or there needed to be a bill of sale and transfer documents, even though her signature on the title, I thought, would suffice.

Also, I wasn’t sure how to exactly fill out my car title, so I left it blank and figured the DMV would tell me how to do it so I didn’t completely fuck it up and void my title.

So, I’m at the DMV — this lady, who was extremely surly and rude, proceeds to tell me I can’t fill out my car title in front of her and then draws large circles on my car title, indicating where I need to fill out information, then writes on the side “bring in bill of sale.”

Bitch just voided my car title.

And then told me it was going to be, not the $100ish I expected from an incorrect website, but like $400.

Sigh… so then I had to request a new car title from Georgia. But in the mean time, I had out of state expired tags.

I called the bad advice friend sobbing, who instructed me to do this:

I called my boss (because I had to do this on my lunch break) and told her I had to drive to Georgia.

I made the trip, went to the DMV in the town where I used to live — an hour and a half away — and told them I lost my Georgia drivers license, and the replacement was free. Then go over to the tag office and get a new Georgia sticker for my tag.

And that’s what I did.

Months and months later, after said friend and I parted company, my nana gets a letter talking about how my Georgia registration is suspended because I don’t have insurance.

Fuck. Mother fucker. Son of a bitch.

I do have insurance! Florida insurance!


So, I get word back from the tag office in Georgia that I need a lien release to get my title.

I had to call my loan company who told me to call this other company, and $45 dollars later I have a lien release.


Then it’s another fee to get my title from Georgia.

Then $400 to get my tags — and I’m living on ramen right now….

So…. I’ve been driving around on suspended/expired out of state tags.

Which is illegal. And I don’t recommend it to anyone.

Yesterday, I had a Florida Highway Patrol (FHP — state highway police) pull up behind me as I was turning left. I’ve gotten pretty good at avoiding cops, using the always useful right hand turn, urge to randomly pull into a parking lot, etc… Thinking I was going to be pulled over, my guts clenched in anxiety and terror as I gripped the wheel thinking any time now, I’m going to get the blue light special. He’s going to see my shame of my wrong colored sticker on my car and give me a lecture, a $1000000000000 ticket, and throw me in jail where I’m going to live Orange is the New Black for my goddamn expired tags.

The green arrow pops up. And I turn, and he turns. I swiftly pull a right into a shopping center parking lot, fully expecting him to follow and see the impending blue lights.

But he just goes on.

I laugh, tears pouring out of my eyes, in my car shouting “There is a God and God loves me.”

This morning, on the way to work, encountered eight different types of law enforcement — three city police, three sheriff (one a motorcycle), and two FHP. Now, I work in a nicer area of town and usually don’t see that many police in the area.

But damn. Said God who loves me, is definitely telling me to get my shit together.

Next month, I’m going to have three paychecks. And I’m going to get my registration right.


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17 thoughts on “The God Who Loves Me

        • Eh… I never really know the purpose of the sheriff other than they’re at the county level. City police and highway police love pulling people over. I’ve been able to get away with this for a year and every time I think I’m going to be the one getting pulled over, someone in a huge jacked up truck or a BMW will go 70 in a 45 or run a red light right in front of me. or weave in and out of traffic, and I think to myself, yeah… they have more important things to deal with than my expired tags.

          Liked by 1 person

          • Sheriff’s here are little more than glorified money collectors. They have all the rules of a police officer behind them but they are at a different front line and since not everyone here is holding a weapon when they go and ask for money or goods to the value of the don’t always have to have a gun fight.

            In this country expired tags or registration means no insurance no insurance means that in the case of an at fault accident you’ll get no sympathy from anyone one including a judge, and you could be paying for it for the rest of your life. How much insurance one has is up to them but without registration no insurance company will pay out no matter how much insurance is paid for. Being registered in most states gives the very basic insurance that we used to call “bomb” insurance that covered you for the damage you did but not to you own property. There is very few people in this country who would look fondly on expired rego. And now they have cameras that can park on the side of the road and read rego plates and give the operator all the details of that car in two seconds there is thankfully more and more unregistered cars getting off the road. That’s part of the Sheriff’s job, he runs the camera, finds unregistered cars, or those with outstanding warrants simply by driving around carparks. It’s brilliant system.

            Liked by 1 person

          • Suddenly, I’m glad I don’t live there lol. I get what your saying though. If a person’s insurance depends on registration, it can be really shitty if there is an accident. Luckily, the only thing mandated is that you have insurance within the stage you are registered… if not the state will find out and suspend your registration.

            Liked by 1 person

          • It’s about $500 to be caught driving unregistered and a loss of points on your licence. Registration is just another government fee but it also means that anyone injured in a road accident of any kind will be covered for all medical no matter who is at fault or who is insured. To not pay registration and be injured is akin to getting everyone else pay and still expecting gold treatment.

            I applaud the sheriff’s for being able to get unregistered cars off the road but the best bit is finding such people often finds other things. Something like 80% of all unregistered cars are driven by people who owe money or have outstanding warrants for arrest.

            Liked by 1 person

          • The stupid thing is if you had warrants and flew here, we’d let you in providing they weren’t major crimes. If we flew over there and have and outstanding warrant for spitting on the side walk we can’t get into the country. You buggers don’t make it very inviting!!

            Liked by 1 person

          • It’s your leaders trying to protect you. They don’t want to import dickheads into the country, where as in this country we let them in and then we can blame the country they came from for sending us dickheads and being a bad influence.

            Liked by 1 person

          • Well… it’s when you bring in said dickheads thst have a culture that’s toxic…. and they bring the toxic culture they’re “fleeing” from with them instead of adapting or assimilating into the culture In which they relocated to…. I know here there were some highly publicized FGM cases….

            Liked by 1 person

          • We feel the same about inviting you Americans to Australia, but you keep coming 😛

            Watch Crocodile Dundee and you all think Australia is exciting and wonderful and you run away. But you’re suppose to run away and join a circus, not runaway and bring the circus with you 😛

            Liked by 1 person

  1. I got pulled over in either Florida or Virginia (I don’t remember which one) for driving on expired and out of state tags *and* no inspection sticker (like, almost six months because I’ve been poor forever). The cop gave me the ticket and I got the tags changed and the inspection and went to court to show that I got everything done. The judge shook his finger at me and said, “Remember to do so in a timely manner next time. Next!” And that was that. No fines. I was so confused, I thought fersure I’d be paying out the nose for driving so long on out of state tags.

    Liked by 1 person

    • I mean, some of these fees are ridiculous. Like… why cant you just get registration/tags done every time the vehicle changes hands, or when it is finally “decommissioned”… why do you have to renew every year? It almost feels like extortion. It makes sense to update registration every time the vehicle changes ownership — it’s in a different place with a different person and the registration needs to reflect. But every. single. year.

      I’m convinced I should have kept Georgia insurance and just registered it as under S.O’s address.


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